Lost VeriZons

There’s an old joke:

How do you cure a Jewish nymphomaniac?

Answer: Marry her.

 In other words, be careful what you wish for ! 

Here’s another old one , from Groucho Marx,

  “I’d never join any group that would have me as a member!”

 And here’s a newer joke:

 How do you become  a Verizon “Elite” customer ?

Answer: Don’t become a customer of Verizon!

 THE BACKGROUND

In a miracle comparable only to The Red Sea parting,

our current phone, cable  and Internet provider , Comcast, actually came through as I stuck with them while my phone and Internet went off  8 x  over 21 days and after 7 – count ’em – 7 service calls, they amazingly  fixed it … and  gave us  a very heavily discounted month for our troubles , just as they should have, complete with the direct phone numbers of their advanced customer service agents should troubles start again. God bless Kim!.

 But since we were never sure that they could fix it,  we had also called verizon,

 their competitor, and arranged a full installation ( phone, Internet, cable)  for March 1.

 But Comcast fixed it for good so far and so  , just yesterday, we called Verizon and cancelled the installation with an agent who I am sure looked just like this

.

 BUT THEN….. like magic  we were immediately switched from that agent to  an ‘Elite customer’service agent who I’m sure looked like this …

and who sweetly asked ,  “Since you are an “elite customer” , what can we do to get your business?”.

 Well, since they asked, we suggested a course of action that was ,ahem, favorable to us…and they said they’d get back to us.

But,  here’s the dilemma…I’m not a Verizon customer and I know that the instant that I become a customer of Verizon , I will immediately lose my ELITE  status as a Verizon customer because I would then be a Verizon customer  ……. and frankly, I have come to enjoy my ELITE customer status because I’m not one.

 

 Verizon trucks which used to whiz by now stop and ask if I need anything at the grocery store. The other day a technician showed up unexpectedly and asked if we needed any jars opened .  A few others offered to walk the dog and if it snows tomorrow, they promised to come shovel. We already have our invite to the Verizon July 4th picnic and they’re going to drive us over and take us back in the bucket on their bucket truck.

  Wheeeeeee.

 I like being an ELITE customer.

Good customer service is so rare.

Too bad they don’t use it on the customers.

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Published in: on February 23, 2010 at 8:22 am  Comments (3)  
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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. BRILLIANT post, and masterfully laid out! Please let us know how we can further praise and help you.

    • I’d like to be an ultra elite customer if possible. How can I best do that…perhaps to never ever mention the word “verizon” again might help.

  2. I am glad we were able to fix the problem for you. If you need assistance in the future, please feel free to contact me. I work for Comcast 🙂

    Regards,

    Mark Casem
    Comcast Corp.
    National Customer Operations
    We_can_help@comcast.com


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