Football keeps interrupting the Commercials

First of all, audience, I have been very busy  as my business is exploding upwards, not inwards, hence I haven’t time to write this blog, so,  to all two of you, I thank you for your concern.

 

Watching football yesterday…well, actually I watched the commercials which they kept interrupting for short snippets of NFL football….. these two ads come to mind and I may add them to my Fantasy Advertising League card.

 

1. Burger King now serves breakfast which I guess is a big deal if you’re feeling the need to vomit early in the day …. and the drug store is out of Ipecac.

.

To entice you into their stores for breakfast, their never-ending TV ad campaign consists of an very homely , ugly, gawky, awkward , stupid looking moax  playing the flute enticing you, like a call to arms for the Redcoats of 1778, into the store.

Kind of like The Pied Piper enticing the rats in Hamelin…to Burger King for breakfast. Hmmmm. Yeah, I’m there.

The BK guy is so ugly you can almost smell him and why he would be so excited over this tiny bowl of food is beyond me. Well, beats masturbating, I guess…plus he gets fresh air, a little walk.  I’d never go anywhere on this flute-playing dork’s recommendation.

Whatever happened to  average or better-than -average looking  people; folks like me,  endorsing products……. particularly food. It’s like having a leper endorsing bran flakes..

2. Speaking of Redcoats 

explain to me why during the Colts-Chiefs game yesterday, they kept playing the same Ford commercial, sometimes twice per break,. You know which one….The Redcoats suddenly being attacked  by a Ford Truck driving ‘George Washington’ because , as the ad says, America got two things right, Cars and Freedom“.

I understand that Dick Cheney is protesting the ad, ‘Yeah, they make good trucks, but what’s this freedom bullshit?”

Tonight The Vikings play The Jets in between commercials  and I am looking forward to finding out if any more white people follow The Pied Piper of Burger King  to his lair. Maybe once they do, we’ll be rid of them all come the dawn.

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Published in: on October 11, 2010 at 9:12 am  Leave a Comment  
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Tenure vs. Retirement: You Make The Call

Indiana 

 (The Crossroads of America, according to the sign)

is losing its very prominent Democrat, Senator Evan Bayh

who  announced that he is quitting  the Senate. 

 Actually , he’s retiring  at the end of his term next January  saying he’s fed up with the bullshit !  Everybody is on his case. NOT ME.

 He’s young , He’s got the money. He’s got the name. He’ll get a book deal. He’s got the pension and benefits and he hates his job?

So, put yourself in his shoes….. you have a choice of  spending your  days at home eating bon- bons surrounded by topless,  Nubian slave girls fanning you with ostrich feathers ( a well known Indiana specialty) 

 or dealing on a daily basis with fruitcakes like Senator Mitch McConnell,

Kentucky’s  “Half Man- Half Tortoise“,

(as Stephen Colbert calls him) who only takes breaks from being a ‘pain in the ass’ in The Senate to go and lay his eggs on a beach ,

 

which would you do?

  You’d do the same damn thing ! So lay off Bayh! 

But everybody is shocked because being an incumbent senator  basically gives you tenure! We all expect them to stay ! Once you have it, it’s pretty close to a lifelong job!

 On that note, there are other lifelong jobs.

 Tenured college professors, for one!  Webeneezer hates the whole idea of tenure. It’s insanity and in most  cases, breeds incompetence. Why strive for better…you can’t be fired.   

 And it can be tough to get in some cases .

For example in Huntsville, Alabama last week ,

 Professor Amy Bishop

was denied tenure  at the University of Alabama there and so she allegedly (ahem) shot six people at her  faculty meeting where it was announced , killing three of her colleagues on the spot.

 But even after that genuine burst of sincerity, the University is still probably not giving her tenure. That’s how hard it is to get a lifelong appointment.

The Supreme Court has lifelong appointments too.

  In a poll announced yesterday, 80% of Americans,

FROM BOTH THE  LEFT

 

 AND RIGHT

 

 say that the court’s  recent decision on  allowing corporations, which are ‘persons’ in the eyes of the law,( They’re right, ‘sociopaths” are persons, aren’t they???)  to give as much money as they want to political campaigns was the wrong decision.

 No restrictions !

 Yippee !!!!!

Oops sorry, forgot to mention, I’m a corporation.

But it could work!  For example, as a tribute to The British Royal Family we could appoint

 

a  corporate “person” liike Burger King as the next Ambassador to The Court of St. James.

Not much you can do about it though because John Roberts and the other berobed baboons  have lifelong jobs, so they are under no political pressure as to how and why they make decisions, no matter how much they’re paid to do it!

 

  They usually don’t quit until they are very old or it is discovered that they’ve been dead for two or three years.

   At a recent dinner at The White House 

for  all three branches of government.

Congress showed up.

The Executive did too.

 Meat was the only thing served.

 Somebody asked , “Where are the vegetables?” 

Mrs. Obama answered, “They’ll be here soon. Court is running late”.

WELCOME TO TENURE.