Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s new best girlfriend

So Obama nominates a “Lainie”  for The Supreme Court ,
Lainie Kagan.
No, that ain’t her.
That’s Lainie Kazan whose birthday coincidentally  is today, May 15th.
 This is the nominee, Elena Kagan.
 Gertrude Berg redux 
That’s not so bad actually. Gertrude Berg, whom probably 3% of you ever heard of, was a major media force from the 1920’s on radio through to 1962.  She died in 1966 when, I believe, she acccidentally ingested one of my mother’s matzohballs.
Most of the time , women outlive their men, but in her case, her husband  lived another 20 years. He probably enjoyed the quiet.
There’s an old joke about the kid who comes home from Hebrew School and proudly tells his parents over dinner  that he got a role in the school play .
 His mom asks , “What role did they give you?”.
The kid responds, “I play the role of the Jewish husband.”.
His dadasks, “How come they didn’t give you a speaking role?”
  I can imagine the upcoming Kagan confirmation herrings, er  hearings since its so hard for the ‘Pubs to find something she’s written or decided.
 She’ll handle it….
“Tutelah, who care’s if you’re orange?
 So they won’t stop abortions. Here, have some soup. We’ll talk , you’ll vote and by the way, I have to ask , why are you orange? Who do you think you are changing skin color, Michael Johnson?”
The hearings should be interesting as the Republican’s push their Marxist agenda with their Marxist motto  ,
 Whatever it is, I’m against it 
 as sung by Mr. Marx himself  (above) in “Horsefeathers”
 If they can’t find any bad stuff, they’ll harp on the fact that she didn’t say much and that they can’t find anything. See, ‘harp’ing…. 
 more Marxism !

But I guess silence can be golden. It’s worth noting that their favorite Great Black Dope, Sooo-preme Court Justice  Clarence Thomas has yet to say even a single word from the bench in the 20 years he’s been on it .

Rumor has it that he did once.
In 1999 at a meeting , after 8 years on the bench, he finally said two words, “Bench Hard” and legend has it that Justice Rehnquist told him to stop bitching all the time.
He’s been quiet ever since
It should be great theater as my favorite flock of self-serving spineless , boneless chickens  aka The US Senate, grills her intensely .
Reminds me of the old joke about the old Jewish lady who asks the kosher butcher for a chicken.  
He hands her a dead , skinned chicken…
and she proceeds to sniff  under the chicken’s wings, opens it beak and sniffs,  and then turns it over  and sniffs it’s crotch.
She hands it back to the butcher and says in her Yiddish accent, “I don’t want this chicken. It’s rotten!”
The butcher takes it back and says,
“No problem Lady , just one question…could you pass that test?”
Good morning, Senator…could you ?

Tenure vs. Retirement: You Make The Call


 (The Crossroads of America, according to the sign)

is losing its very prominent Democrat, Senator Evan Bayh

who  announced that he is quitting  the Senate. 

 Actually , he’s retiring  at the end of his term next January  saying he’s fed up with the bullshit !  Everybody is on his case. NOT ME.

 He’s young , He’s got the money. He’s got the name. He’ll get a book deal. He’s got the pension and benefits and he hates his job?

So, put yourself in his shoes….. you have a choice of  spending your  days at home eating bon- bons surrounded by topless,  Nubian slave girls fanning you with ostrich feathers ( a well known Indiana specialty) 

 or dealing on a daily basis with fruitcakes like Senator Mitch McConnell,

Kentucky’s  “Half Man- Half Tortoise“,

(as Stephen Colbert calls him) who only takes breaks from being a ‘pain in the ass’ in The Senate to go and lay his eggs on a beach ,


which would you do?

  You’d do the same damn thing ! So lay off Bayh! 

But everybody is shocked because being an incumbent senator  basically gives you tenure! We all expect them to stay ! Once you have it, it’s pretty close to a lifelong job!

 On that note, there are other lifelong jobs.

 Tenured college professors, for one!  Webeneezer hates the whole idea of tenure. It’s insanity and in most  cases, breeds incompetence. Why strive for better…you can’t be fired.   

 And it can be tough to get in some cases .

For example in Huntsville, Alabama last week ,

 Professor Amy Bishop

was denied tenure  at the University of Alabama there and so she allegedly (ahem) shot six people at her  faculty meeting where it was announced , killing three of her colleagues on the spot.

 But even after that genuine burst of sincerity, the University is still probably not giving her tenure. That’s how hard it is to get a lifelong appointment.

The Supreme Court has lifelong appointments too.

  In a poll announced yesterday, 80% of Americans,





 say that the court’s  recent decision on  allowing corporations, which are ‘persons’ in the eyes of the law,( They’re right, ‘sociopaths” are persons, aren’t they???)  to give as much money as they want to political campaigns was the wrong decision.

 No restrictions !

 Yippee !!!!!

Oops sorry, forgot to mention, I’m a corporation.

But it could work!  For example, as a tribute to The British Royal Family we could appoint


a  corporate “person” liike Burger King as the next Ambassador to The Court of St. James.

Not much you can do about it though because John Roberts and the other berobed baboons  have lifelong jobs, so they are under no political pressure as to how and why they make decisions, no matter how much they’re paid to do it!


  They usually don’t quit until they are very old or it is discovered that they’ve been dead for two or three years.

   At a recent dinner at The White House 

for  all three branches of government.

Congress showed up.

The Executive did too.

 Meat was the only thing served.

 Somebody asked , “Where are the vegetables?” 

Mrs. Obama answered, “They’ll be here soon. Court is running late”.